Dec 12, 2014
With my new clothes has come a new confidence. We went out to a friend's Christmas party - Emmy & Ethan's friend Noah - where all the kids used to go to the same dayhome. I have seen them a few times since treatment but not since surgery. It was awesome trying to decide what to wear - because I had choices!
When we got there the kids were off like a shot and I could focus on the conversation and not on how I looked. It was a fun party and even Santa came by for a visit! I hope it brought some normalcy for Emmy. We came to this party last year, before her life was affected by my diagnosis.
I'm always amazed at how supportive and accepting everyone has been. This group is no different. I am very blessed indeed to be surrounded by such caring people.
Everyone had a blast.
Emmy had her Spark's dance the following Monday. I had a bad cold so Phil took her for me...I admit I felt guilty and sad that I couldn't take her. But at least it wasn't due to anything canser related. Just regular 'mom' guilt and not 'canser mom' guilt...Anyways, it was with all the troops in the area - Sparks, Brownies, Girl Guides etc. She wore a dress and went with Rebekah - a good friend she met at preschool last year - and who's mom has become one of my good friends! She came back pink faced and happy. That made me happy.
I was supposed to meet with my wonderful friend Fiona for dinner the next night but was still under the weather. Emily had a family potluck and Christmas concert at school that Thursday. It was for all the Kindergarten classes and I was worried I'd be too sick to go. I made sure to rest lots and drink herbal tea.
She asked me if I could wear my wig and fake boobs to the potluck. This time instead of saying no I said "of course". If I could get all dolled up for my work party, surely I could accept this small request from one of the people i love most in the world?
So Thurs came and I was going no matter what. Emily had been talking (and singing lol) about it all week. So I dressed to the nines, including my high boots (not the 4 inchers..my 3 inchers - didn't want to be mistaken for a streetwalker baha) and yes my wig and boobs. I did it all for my Emmy cause she desperately just wanted to have a "normal mom" like all the rest of the kids. My sis in law Andrea put it into perspective for me "school is the one place she has anonymity - unless she tells people, no one knows about the breast canser. She's just another kid with a "regular mom".
And Emmy was thrilled with the results.
"You look beautiful Mommy!!"
She was positively glowing! I knew I had made the right choice. It wasn't about standards of beauty for her - it was about a mom with hair and boobs - which I guess is about as basic as it gets really. Why would I deny her that?
And it was fabulous. We heard Christmas carols in French and English (she's in French immersion). There was food from many different cultures and countries.
We were really starting to get into the Christmas spirt... Phil even put up extra indoor Christmas lights so the party could double as a Christmas party!
It was like someone hit the pause button in this canser storm and we were able to just be a normal family...
That feeling right there was my 'Christmas come early'.
And it felt great.
When we got there the kids were off like a shot and I could focus on the conversation and not on how I looked. It was a fun party and even Santa came by for a visit! I hope it brought some normalcy for Emmy. We came to this party last year, before her life was affected by my diagnosis.
Everyone had a blast.
Emmy had her Spark's dance the following Monday. I had a bad cold so Phil took her for me...I admit I felt guilty and sad that I couldn't take her. But at least it wasn't due to anything canser related. Just regular 'mom' guilt and not 'canser mom' guilt...Anyways, it was with all the troops in the area - Sparks, Brownies, Girl Guides etc. She wore a dress and went with Rebekah - a good friend she met at preschool last year - and who's mom has become one of my good friends! She came back pink faced and happy. That made me happy.
I was supposed to meet with my wonderful friend Fiona for dinner the next night but was still under the weather. Emily had a family potluck and Christmas concert at school that Thursday. It was for all the Kindergarten classes and I was worried I'd be too sick to go. I made sure to rest lots and drink herbal tea.
She asked me if I could wear my wig and fake boobs to the potluck. This time instead of saying no I said "of course". If I could get all dolled up for my work party, surely I could accept this small request from one of the people i love most in the world?
So Thurs came and I was going no matter what. Emily had been talking (and singing lol) about it all week. So I dressed to the nines, including my high boots (not the 4 inchers..my 3 inchers - didn't want to be mistaken for a streetwalker baha) and yes my wig and boobs. I did it all for my Emmy cause she desperately just wanted to have a "normal mom" like all the rest of the kids. My sis in law Andrea put it into perspective for me "school is the one place she has anonymity - unless she tells people, no one knows about the breast canser. She's just another kid with a "regular mom".
And Emmy was thrilled with the results.
"You look beautiful Mommy!!"
She was positively glowing! I knew I had made the right choice. It wasn't about standards of beauty for her - it was about a mom with hair and boobs - which I guess is about as basic as it gets really. Why would I deny her that?
And it was fabulous. We heard Christmas carols in French and English (she's in French immersion). There was food from many different cultures and countries.
 |
| Right in the middle back row hands up lol |
I was so happy we had a normal, happy week. No doctors appointments, no being sick (from canser or treatment) Just good ol family time. It made me very excited for my "Well canser it's been a slice" end of surgery party coming up on Sat.
We were really starting to get into the Christmas spirt... Phil even put up extra indoor Christmas lights so the party could double as a Christmas party!
It was like someone hit the pause button in this canser storm and we were able to just be a normal family...
That feeling right there was my 'Christmas come early'.
And it felt great.
 |
| Our weekly hot chocolate date |
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