I hated every minute of training, but I said "Don't quit. Suffer now. And live out the rest of your life as champion". -Muhammad Ali

June 30, 2014

So before getting to this week's chemo experience (next post), let me rewind to Monday's oncologist appointment.

So me, my Mom and Grandma (who's in from Montreal - yay!) go to the Tom Baker to confirm my 6 vs 8 chemo treatments. We get my blood work done first (all about the neuts!) and then we wait to see the doc. We have a quick chat with the nurse and then in comes another young male doc (kinda hot I have to say lol) who asks about side effects from last round etc. We talk a bit about the surgeon and 6 rounds and he alludes to 8 rounds still being the way my oncologist wants to go (my heart sinks). I start my argument about 6 vs 8. He asks to examine me - esp after I tell him the surgeon couldn't find the lump 1 1/2 weeks ago, nor anything in my lymph nodes (the last the oncologist had heard about size was from ultrasound which was previous Friday before surgeon appointment)

He examines me. I'm feeling quite defiant and am still blabbering on about how strongly I would like 6 even as he is diligently searching for the lump. He examines both breasts cause he can't seem to find any "feelable" trace of the lump or my lymph nodes. So he tells me "I"ll talk to the Dr but he's pretty set on 8 rounds so you may have a hard time to convince him". 

My mom pipes up "If he tells her 8, he's going to have to deal with a puddle".

I go on to re-hash what the surgeon said about more chemo not being better if I don't need it and how surgery times could be removed from the table with talking about timing cause he's flexible. So I'm not keen at all on doing the 8 for the sake of 8.

The young doc looks at me and says "well you didn't hear it from me, but its your body. You can say no." This takes me by surprise. He's on my side it seems. At least he's listening to what I am saying,. Then he promises me he'll discuss it with my oncologist and do his best to plead my case for 6 rounds not 8.

After a few minutes they both come in and I ready myself for a fight. My oncologist is smiling which is a good sign...I think. 

He says "so I'd like to do 1 more round of FEC (the one I've been doing) because the canser is responding so well to it". (my heart sinks again)

Me: Ok....

Dr: That way it leaves 8 rounds on the table if needed (me: Grimace) but I'll schedule an ultrasound after your 6th round and if there's nothing left we'll just do 6 (me: big grin!) And then that way you'll only potentially need to do 2 rounds of the doxitacil (new drug) instead of 3 rounds.

I tell him I will still schedule an appointment with surgeon leading up to my 6th round and tell my surgeon it will be dependent on the ultrasound results the following week. I"m also pretty sure somewhere in there I emphatically made the point that my preference was for 6 rounds. Like maybe just short of screaming it from the top of my lungs...

Oh and my nurse had my blood work. Remember how my neuts going into the last round were at 1.4 and the cut off for chemo is typically 1.5? Well I don't know if it was the 10% reduction in chemo, my focusing on iron rich foods or the few Guinness, but my counts were up at 1.9!! (I'm leaning towards the Guinness...)

So despite 6 rounds not being written in stone, I left pretty happy. Got a reprieve from being a guinea pig with new drug, and time to build myself up mentally. Going to try to meditate every day from now till then.

I'm also hoping by continuing to focus on iron rich foods, and exercising it will get my counts up again. I'm no Dr but it can't hurt right??

Now all my energy will be focused on obliterating the canser so by round 6 it's not visible on ultrasound. It's not easy cause as each week passes it gets harder to dig deep, but now that I have a goal to reach I'm gonna have to "up my game".

To quote my friend Dave: "Kicking ass and taking names...and the name is canser!".