Hey Cancer - How Do You Like Me Now?

April 29, 2014

Of all the 'unknowns' that I've come up against since starting this journey, strangely having not one but three toxic drugs injected into me has caused the least amount of anxiety...go figure.

So I walked into Tom Baker with Phil by my side, not a cloud in the sky and war paint on my face. It felt very empowering. 

"I am woman hear me roar lol" 

Ha ha ha. Had lots of smiles from fellow comrades. Had a doctor tell me he liked the marks as he walked by:

Me: Thanks, its my first chemo treatment
Dr: Good for you!

A few patients families all smiled and some gave me thumbs up or a nod. Lots of patients lit up when they saw me. All this added to my courage. And it made people happy! That's powerful stuff for me. My Inner Ninja was purring....guess she's over the whole being bound and gagged from the other day lol

I've taken the attitude of embracing these chemo drugs as part of my army helping me to fight each battle. The nurse said to the first one before injecting it "go where you're supposed to go". I silently added a "yes please".

It was 4 syringes - BIG syringes - and it was red. I mentioned on facebook how some call it the Red Devil. Lovely name for a liquid I willingly put in my body...

Anyways I didn't feel any burning in my veins. And my vein didn't collapse...hey wait did I volunteer for this kind of drug?! 

She had the IV in my hand which they typically don't do but mine were so fat and juicy (her words, I swear not mine!!) so she used it. And it worked as it should. Thank you veins! So two Silver Linings right off the bat - good veins and no immediate reaction to the drugs as it was being administered.

She had to push that puppy manually into me (so many people have my life in their hands these days...) so at least she was in control She flushed out my veins with lots of saline solution between drugs....

I wonder if its equivalent to smelling coffee beans between scents to "cleanse your pallet" - maybe my blood needs its pallet cleansed between toxins??

Anyways my nurse - Stephanie - was awesome. Wonder if there's a nurse request app....

Next drug was the one that starts with an F and that one had no ill effects either but she expected that. That ones goes through the IV machine and was fast. Like 15 minutes. Maybe. I've decided its my favorite so far - even if I only remember the first letter of its name lol

The last one was the longest - about 45 min or so, also through the IV machine. This one made me fuzzy headed (although could have been the pre meds I took before for nausea) Toward the end it gave me a head ache. So she slowed it down for the last 10 min or so (how fast it was going into me) I'm not a fan of this last one but maybe it just needs to be administered a bit slower next time (its the C in FEC)

In all it was only like 2 hours. I felt fine except for fuzzy headedness (ie high feeling lol) We even stopped by a health food store on the way home.

Did I mention I still had my war paint on???

Got some weird looks. Ah well, let them stare - didn't bother me. 

When we got home we ate a bit (salad!) Then we took Daisy for a 30 min walk. I was feeling a bit queasy by then but it may have been heartburn. Figured if I sit or I walk-same difference so what would it hurt? It helped! (and yes I remembered to take off the war paint before we left)

Was able to eat some lentil vegetable soup (ya I wasn't sure what that was either...) I ate part of it. Took my pill. Then 20 minutes later ate the rest. And kept it down! Drinking ginger tea and saltine crackers have been HUGE help. Bananas too. So I'm rolling with it. The saltines are only for next few days but I'll try and find gluten free replacement. I don't really want something that could 'feed' the cancer going into my body if I can help it. But if its the only thing that will work, I'm fine with it.

They gave me drugs to take every AM (3 pills) and every PM (2 pills) for side effects over the next 2 days. Then I should be over the worst of it. 

After having fairly wretched nausea with both pregnancies (Emmy for 5 1/2 months)  I"m a bit of a pro at nausea. I still hate it. But 4 days compared to 5 months isnt' so bad. Keeping things in perspective. And my eye is on the prize. I just hope I'm up to exercise tomorrow - even if its just a walk. Inside. From my bed to the couch lol

I read earlier that epsom salt baths are good during chemo to flush out the toxins. So I might do that shortly. See how it makes me feel (I've come to terms with being a guinea pig at the moment) Should at least help me sleep!

So day 1 I'm not doing too badly, considering. Nausea got pretty yucky there for a bit but I think the food (thankfully) helped. And maybe the ginger tea. Kimmy told me peppermint is awesome too. And I have lots of chamomile tea too.

Oh and I should mention The Rules for while I'm doing chemo....and don't have an immune system:

1.  If you're sick, been around someone who was sick (or is sick) or live with someone who's         sick, you cannot come over. That includes colds, coughs, sneezes etc. NO SICKIES!

2. Hand sanitizer is set up at front door. Any body who walks through said door will need to        sanitize their hands. And on their way out. 

3. No sharing foods, drinks, bodily fluids (ha just seeing if you're paying attention!)

4. Please DO come visit if you are not sick...Give me this week to see how I fare with all the         acute reactions and then please, by all means, visit!

By the way, all the encouraging words, messages, texts, calls gave me the courage I needed today to face this with very little anxiety, so thank you.

Every single message helped. 

And the war paint....we'll have to up the aunty next time :)